God's Love in a Harsh Place

“Go visit the women in jail,” that’s what I felt stirring in my heart one Sunday morning at church. It seemingly came out of nowhere which is why I ignored it. Yet, that stirring would not let up. For months, I felt that calling again and again. I even began seeing confirmation of it in my life, but still, I ignored it. After all, jail is not the kind of place you want to rush off to visit.

When I shared this calling with some family members and friends, many warned me not to go. My mom expressed concern over my safety. Despite all of this, that calling was still there.

I finally decided to make a call to an organization that provides mentors to women in jail. I went through the application process, background check and training. Soon, I was ready to go into the jail.

This place was a far cry from my suburban life. My circle of women wore skinny jeans and drank skinny lattes from Starbucks. These women in jail had tattoos on their necks and baggy prison clothes hung over their bodies. Maybe my mom was right, I thought. This isn’t the place for me.

Despite that, I decided to go. When I walked in on that first day, I was so nervous. It’s such a sterile place. Barbed wire everywhere and guards watching your every move. There’s complete silence except for the loud metal doors shutting behind you and echoing in the corridor. Every step was in prayer. Every step, I'd whisper, “God be with me.”

Something very strange happened next. Something I could have never imagined. In the midst of my fear, peace began to pour in. Soon, I was at ease.

Two chairs were set. One for me and one for the woman I would mentor. She came out and sat across from me. Face to face, in this moment, I could see into her eyes and I had this understanding that we were both beloved. That we were both children of God. I could feel God’s love for her pouring through me.

I came hoping to bring her encouragement and instead God had something to show me.

I’ve spent a lifetime learning stories about God. Stories about His love and mercy for us. How He redeems and restores lives. To be honest, they often felt just like stories from long ago, but they came to life for me in that jail week after week.

In that place, I got a front row seat to witness God’s redemptive and powerful love unleashed. I learned that God’s presence is not bound to cathedrals, He also resides in corridors of the county jail. I was taken back by the irony of feeling God’s holy presence in such a sterile place. Those long cold corridors in the jail are sacred ground and the people behind the heavy metal doors are His beloved. They may have been forgotten by many, but not by God. He’s in the hearts of women whose flesh has been abused and misused, reminding them that they are worthy.

I had this undeniable understanding that the women behind those walls were equally loved by God, just as I was. It didn’t matter what they had done, whether they could recite scripture or not, their hearts were open to God and He swooped them into His arms. There, I saw the story of the prodigal son come to life in such a profound way again and again. These women had wandered, but they came back and when they did, God welcomed them with open arms. I saw women drink from the living water after years of being thirsty. One look at them and you could see, they felt God’s love, acceptance and forgiveness.

It was in that jail, that God became everything I had read about. In that place meant to punish, I found the greatest redeemer. God’s love pierced through every barbed wire fence, every door and every shackle. It blasted through the classifications of inmate, volunteer and guard. None of that mattered. We were all his beloved children…the sinners and the so-called saints.